A regular muggle living in an all to muggle-world,
a little part of me died when I realised I'd never get to go to Hogwarts.
I want to be 11 again.
But it's too late, cause Severus Snape's already dead.
So is Michael Jackson.
Why am I always just a little too late? The name's Nisha. Welcome to my world.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Ruined my childhood in 5 minutes.
"This is the whole story:
The Rugrats really were a figment of Angelica's Imagination. Chucky died a long time ago along with this mother, that's why Chaz is a nervous wreck all the time. Tommy was a stillborn, that's why Stu is constantly in the basement making toys for the son who never had a chance to live. The DeVilles had an abortion, Angelica couldn't figure whether it would be a boy or a girl thus creating the twins
-----------------------------
As for "All Grown Up" Angelica was a bipolar schizophrenic who, as a teenager became addicted to various Narcotics, bringing her back to her childhood and thus her creations she obsessed over, because of time lapse between the present and the last time she interacted with her creations, she made them older, Angelica was constantally taking hits of acid, so she would never have to live without her creations who were her only company, in a judgemental world Angelica's mom actually died of a heroine overdose, Angelica was schizophrenic/bipolar because she was a crack baby, additionaly Drew in his depression married a gold digging whore, that Angelica idolized because she fooled herself into thinking it was her real mom, but always had a concept of her mom, Cynthia, and took a barbie doll, and made it after her mom's image, wearing an unwashed oranged dress, and having jacked up hair, which is why she was so attached to it, later in life she followed in her mom footsteps w/ drugs and everything, dieing of overdose at age 13 when All Grown Up! was "canceled" The only rugrat not to be fictional however, was unborn Tommy's brother Dil, however Angelica didnt know the differace between Dil and her creations, Dil didnt follow her commands, after endless crying and a refusal to disapear like the others did when angelica was angry with them, she hit him. And she hit him, screaming a screaching tune, Stu ran in and pulled his neice off of his only child, but it was too late, he had a brain hemerage, which resulted in a deformation, as he grew up his damage only became more evident, by the time he was 9 in All Grown Up! He lived as an outcast, being ridiculed for his weirdness, and retardation, the immense guilt over this is what led to her drug use and is what led Angelica to un-create the rugrats breifly, until her expericance w/ hallucinogenics. On a trip to Paris to find love, Chaz married a hooker named Kira (He was actually going to marry a differant hooker, but she just wanted him for his money), who had a daughter named Kimi that was torn from her because she was a cocaine addict (Angelica imagined her from Kira's stories), he lost his mind after the death of his wife and was in denial that she was ever prostitue, upon return to America, Chaz and Kira married and she got her greencard, it was actually a really happy/romantic story, Kira continually stuggled with addiction, but was relatively happy w/ her life, and Chaz Suzie was actually Angelica's only friend, who entertained the thought of Angelica's creations, for her, She later became a phycologist and teamed up w/ Nickelodeon to make the Rugrats! When Angelica died of drug overdose, she helped arrange her funeral, Angelica's death was sad, because of her addiction, she was expelled from society, which lead to a break with reality, and her eventual death, she spent the last days of her life in the back of the school cafeteria, imagining friends around her, and playing with the lives of her creations. She died March 5, 1994, tag your friends if you were throughly mindraped, this is the truth behind your childhood."
I don't know if this is true because I have high doubts. And God knows I'm skeptical about things like this. Or maybe I just refuse to believe it, because come on. I grew up with this cartoon and you expect me to digest something so twisted and depressing as this? I can't.. I just can't. If this is not true, however, the person who came up with this mumbo jumbo is sick in the mind. I know its stupid to get so worked up about a cartoon, but.. this is a part of my childhood. It's like you're telling me all this time, I was never moving on my own, I was controlled. It's too much to digest.
I do intend to investigate this matter though.
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12:58 AM
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
:/
Well I just realized I don't have much emotions.
It's weird. I laugh a lot and stuff but yeah that's it. I laugh, and boom. Gone. Nothing. Nada. Capishe. Ilek.
Not saying that it's a good thing cause people get annoyed by my emotionless presence a lot. They expect me to be so jolly and gay (which means happy, mind you) about everything.
It's not that my feelings don't exist, per se. It's just that I don't show them much. I'm emotionless, oblivious and ignorant. People think I'm arrogant and stuff, but I'm not. I just don't notice.. my surroundings cause I talk to myself in my mind sometimes.
Yes, I'm a weirdo, so people don't get me. Except for Juju, cause she's a weirdo too. We're just two weirdos doing weird shit.
Yesterday an upper six kid chatted with me on Facebook. It's strange cause we've never talked before, ever. Turns out he watches my videos and uhh.. yeah he likes my voice. We chatted for a while and topics were changed and added.
Then he asked about me and Sandy. Which was again, strange, cause I thought the stupid rumour went away already. Well turns out I thought wrong.
The damned rumour is still spreading (well quite slower now, thank God) amongst the form sixxers. Jealousy, of course is still there among the girls.
But it's not true. So why should I give a shit?
There goes my ignorance.
OH YEAH, PLEASE THE PERSON WHO TOOK MY ART/SONG/PIANO FOLDER, RETURN IT TO ME. MY LIFE SORTA DEPENDS ON IT.
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10:48 PM
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Well I..
Well I've been feeling quite down lately. And as usual, people keep asking me what's biting my ass. I'll just reply with a 'Why would you care?, and walk away.
That's really mean for me to say to someone who actually cares for me. I don't know. God knows that I'm a pessimist. So I keep on seeing the bad side of people instead of the obvious good stuff about them.
For example, a person could be super nice to me and I won't notice that cause I see his crooked teeth or something like that.
I'm such a bad person. I really really realize that now. Seeing the downside of everything is what I do. It's so tiring.
Well anyways, ever since I recommended this Blogger Droid app thing to Sandy, I've quite enjoyed blogging lately.
I guess it's cause I blog on my bed while laying on my back now. No pressure there.
She & Him has been on replay on my iPod lately. They actually help a lot during one of my mood swings. There's just something about Zooey's voice that's so soothing and enjoyable. I'd trade my voice for hers. I really would.
Well I'm gonna fall asleep to Black Hole by She & Him now. Goodnight.
P/s: Whatever happened to you, Sandy?
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12:15 AM
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
You Really Got A Hold On Me.
Well I'm inspired by this one band, She & Him. Never really was a fan of Indie Folk which is their genre. But these two are just.. amazing in a way.
So now I'm thinking about making a two man band. Just me and another person. Preferably a guy.
Their sound is just so relaxing. It actually surprised me that I liked them cause I've always been an Avenged Sevenfold or A Day To Remember type of person. But I was a huge fan of NeverShoutNever and She & Him are quite similar in some ways to NSN.
Here are some of their songs.
Huh, so I've been quite adventurous in terms of music nowadays.
6:07 PM
Monday, May 9, 2011
Insert Title Here. LOL idgaf.
Suddenly, the thought of being intimate with a person makes me sick. I mean come on. Us as teenagers actually don't have much time, no, memang takde masa pun, for 'love'. I put in quotations because I highly doubt it's love anyways because the ones that drives us to do shit like this are hormones. Pure hormones.
Whenever I see a couple, a teen couple, who are a tad bit too serious, I just think automatically "Idiots."
That seems bitchy but they are idiots for believing that they would last until they reach adulthood.
I'm not being pessimistic. I'm a realist. People usually mistaken those two for the same thing.
So let me sum it up for you. You and your stupid boyfriend/girlfriend is NOT going to last. The chances are pretty slim that you guys are gonna get married some day. Even couples who are bind by marriage get divorced, what makes you think your relationship is any stronger? With no papers, no bond, nothing.
Now that I've knocked some sense into your brain, maybe you should think twice before getting too serious with your pairs.
But if you guys had already had sex or whatever, I'll just tell you straight away that your life is now screwed.
Kthxbai.
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6:22 PM
Nose bleed
I had a nose bleed at school today and my tudung was drenched in blood. God, global heating is totally going out of line here. I had exams and answering papers while having a nose bleed and a fever is not exactly what you call fun. Good thing none of my blood got onto my paper. That'll just suck so much and I'll hate myself forever.
I'm thinking about making my blog private cause I keep spilling my emotions in here. I don't feel comfortable with random strangers knowing I have period pains.. or if I'm ovulating or some shit like that.
I don't feel very me lately. I posted a song on Facebook. And yeah, technically, I should be happy. But I wasn't. It looked like I was trying too hard to be noticed but I'm not. I'm doing just fine in my shell. I'm doing just fine with not telling people my problems. I just wish they'd understand that I don't like dumping my shit on other people. It's very uncomfortable for me. But they would just keep on asking, and suffocating me with hows and whys. Get off my back, please. I need space to breathe. You people are taking my oxygen and comfort away from me.